Archive for the 'Inside my mind' Category

review: south loop club

February 8, 2009

last night i got called into work by a customer of ours who wanted to hire me to do some contract work for which he would pay me directly instead of paying for our company’s remote hands fee. this is ok for us to do, a lot of employees have done it, but we never solicit offers. Only when a customer contacts us will we accept it.

So, i got into the datacenter at about 10:30, talked to their guys on irc (we’ve actually been friends for a few years), moved three servers from shared-colocation cabinets to their new full cabinet over the course of a few hours, re-labeled all of their newly moved servers, re-cabled everything, and updated their dns zones to reflect the appropriate ptr (reverse dns) records.

By 2am they were all set, i’d made $210, and was free to leave into the night. The problem with getting out at 2am was, the bar i wanted to go to, the blue light, was well over an hour and a half away, and due to close at 4am. There aren’t any bars I can enjoy in the loop, and that was basically the extent of how far i’d reach without resorting to the cta, which I didn’t want to do at 2am on cermak.

So, I opted to simply walk around and see if I could find an OK place to grab a bite to eat siince i was hungry. I didn’t want to go back home to bridgeport that early, because being home before 3am on a saturday night is equal to failure. I ventured west from cermak & calumet, to michigan avenue. At which point, I started traveling north towards the loop.

My walk took me north to 11th, at which point I walked further west to state, and then north to polk where I found a bar i’d heard about, the south loop club. A look at the people sitting/standing inside, and the people walking in told me that i didn’t want to be there. It just didn’t seem like the kinda place that would be friendly to a loner like me.

Call me crazy, because i more than likely am, but i can’t really handle large crowds. Whether they be in a bar/restaurant, or standing in groups dispersed along belmont street. If I’m alone, my mind just deteriorates to the point where i can’t help but think they are teasing me, whether it be out loud in their group of friends, or in their mind. I’ve just lost faith in a compassionate world. Maybe I’m too much of a downer to have people who consistently care about me? Maybe I’m relying on other people too greatly? I’ve seen one friend in the past 8 days, i haven’t been on a date since september of last year, the past 6 – 8 dates i’ve attempted to make have cancelled on me, 3 of which because “omg i forgot its my friends birthday can we please reschedule”.

Of course, they never reschedule, and any attempts i make to reschedule just result in them using other excuses to not see me until I simply give up. Maybe I’m more adventurous than everyone else, and more willing to meet complete strangers. I don’t think i come off as dangerous, i’m not asking for their address the moment they agree to meet up, i’m trying to meet them in public places, and they just jump the day they’re supposed to see me.

Well, anyway. I didn’t want to go into the south loop club, and i was pretty tired. So, i opted to walk to the corner of harrison & state, and sit down against a fence for a few minutes. A few minutes later a homeless guy walked up to me as i sat there, and asked me where the student’s center was. He was looking for a good spot to ask people for help, but he didn’t know what college he was looking for. I wasn’t able to help, but i suggested he travel back south to where he could hassle the people at columbia.

After 6 minutes of sitting, i got back up, and started hiking back west towards halsted. I had considered the number 8 wouldn’t be running, and a check of the cta bus tracker verified this a short while later when i had the motivation to look it up. Well, it was kind of a long walk, from 0e to 800/900W, 9 blocks. Eventually I got to halsted and i had a choice. Get on the blue line, take that back to the loop, and transfer to the redline which i could take home to 35th; or just walk south in hopes that the number 8 would start running after 4am, or that i could find a taxi.

I would end up walking from there (halsted & harrison), down to.. maxwell, where I found a taxi. I took that back south to 33rd, got a burrito from taqueria san jose, and then walked back 3 blocks home.

I got home at about 4:05am. I guess it was an ok night for walking. I found some new spots that i want to venture out to for photography. It was reletively warm for being chicago in february. I hope spring returns for good soon, i think the winter is probably one of the main reasons my mood is so fucked these days.


it’s january 7th

January 7, 2009

If I had to pick one food which represents my spirit more than anything other, it would have to be french toast.

This morning at about 5am I wandered outside to halsted street, grabbed a north-bound bus, got off at roosevelt, and walked from there over to roosevelt & union, and stopped into a delightful little restaurant called White Palace. Don’t let the name fool you, this is not a racist establishment. People of all colors and followings congregate into this ultra-diner, throughout all hours of the night & day, on any given day.

I sat down, and a waitress offered me a cup of coffee. I looked at her, and recognized her from my previous stop in, in mid-July, when I’d gone in for a hamburger at 4am on a saturday night. I accepted her offer of a cup of coffee, and proceeded to load it up with sweet & low and french vanilla coffeemate creamer. I then took a moment to pick out what I’d eat for dinner. I could recall reading a review in which the critic raved about how tasty their toast was. I made it a point to get the toast, because he had made it sound like the greatest thing since birthday presents. In addition to the toast, I also chose french toast, because i had never been disappointed by a breakfast of french toast. I didn’t fuck around with it either, i went straight for the french toast, no strawberries, no bananas, no whipped cream, none of that bullshit. Just straight french toast, syrup, and butter. I’m not a huge fan of butter, either. I was always grossed out by most solidified dairy, but i recently came to accept butter being there. Cottage cheese however, fuckin’ hate it.

So, anyway. I ordered the food, and it was all brought back to me in like 10 minutes. I ate the toast first, and it was just as good as I imagined it would be. Before my food came, I had consumed an additional serving of coffee, and was now on my third cup, mid-toast. I ordered the texas toast, because I couldn’t really understand any of the other words the beautiful latin waitress said to me about the types of toast they had, but the texas toast was decipherable and in the end it worked well for me.

After scarfing down the toast, i moved onto the french toast. This.. frenchtoast.. was.. Delicious! Everything was well presented, and I’m pretty sure adding anything else to the dish would have ruined it. Everything was beautifully toasted, it wasn’t too hard, wasn’t too soft, it was just.. perfect. The kind of perfection you would marry had you found a human being who was able to maintain such a level of perfection (not possible).

After finishing the french toast i got another cup of coffee and some more of the texas toast, and then i got my bill, $9.88. “holy shit is that cheap or what?” i asked myself. I had like 4 pieces of toast, 4 wedges of french toast, and 5 cups of coffee, wow. I paid the normal bill, gave the waitress a nice tip, and wandered outside back to halsted, and then i took the bus back to 33rd where I wandered back home, and now i’m here, writing about toast.

It started snowing again. We had many days of warmth, and now it’s back to this.

Sleep time, bye bye lovers.

Smoke Cigarettes

August 11, 2008

I’ve been depressed since tuesday. This girl I’d fallen for told me that she wasn’t interested after the first date. Yeah, 25 year olds can be emo too. As the week went on, I began to criticize myself more and more, until today when I recognized that my pursuit of all things material was done in vein, and that I can be perfectly content without any of the things I’d put so much emphasis upon during the past year.

Then tonight, I walked up to the CTA redline station at 35th, stood around waiting for my train, and saw a man with his friend, smoking a cigarette. He was maybe 35 years old, had a decent, manly look, and looked completely cool as he smoked his cigarette.

Then, a cop walked up to him, and told him that he could not smoke on the platform. This bothered me greatly, because the tax dollars of both tobacco producers, as well as the man himself went towards the creation & upkeep of that very station. Smoking is completely legal, why the fuck shouldn’t this guy be able to smoke a cigarette, standing no less than 40 feet from every other patron of the station, causing inconvenience to absolutely no one?

However, this guy, as cool as fucking shit, took 3 more hits of his cigarette right in front of the cop before flicking it into the dan ryan expressway.

I have been a proponent of smoker’s rights ever since the city started telling private business owners that they aren’t allowed to let smokers smoke in their establishments. If you don’t like the fact that people are smoking around you, go somewhere else. Business owners should have the right to choose whether or not they want people smoking in their establishments. This isn’t china. We’re supposed to have freedom. Don’t give me your bullshit about second hand smoke either. My mother smoked around me from age 4 to 22, and my health was just fine. Maybe the smoke irritated my eyes on some days where allergens were already kicking my ass, but I still grew up into a completely healthy man, and even grew out of all of my allergies by forcing myself to be around all of the things I was allergic to for extended periods of time where I would be required to breath heavily.

But, back to my story. This guy inspired me. He disobeyed authority right to their fascist fucking faces, and still walked away without penalty.

My train then appeared, and I took that north to chinatown, and made it my intention to walk to wallgreens and buy a pack of cigarettes. As I walked down the street, I saw all the fakes. It’s easy to spot a fake. Any guy who is out on a double date is a fake. I saw maybe 3 different groups of couples double dating, and I despised every guy I saw. Maybe I’m a little jealous, or maybe I’m just really anti-social. I just can’t stand the thought of someone taking these people seriously. Some of them looked in my direction, but I just ignored them and walked down cermak towards my new dream.

At wallgreens, I purchased a pack of bic lighters, and a pack of newport cigarettes. I hadn’t tried smoking cigarettes since I was 16 when a friend offered me one. All of the smokers I know tend to stick to newports, so I bought a pack, and left.

I opened the pack, pulled out a cigarette, lit it, and then began walking to work on the other side of cermak at calumet. Usually when I walk down the street, people give me strange looks. It is a little bit of a rough area, and people don’t usually expect to see a white guy on that street at night. However, with a cigarette in my hand, people looked me in a new way. Like a human being who had real problems. Nobody spoke to me. They just looked me, smiled a little bit, and went back to whatever they were doing.

If you’re a sad, lonely nerd, smoking cigarettes is the best, and coolest thing you can do. Even if you do get bummed out, having your addiction fulfilled will revive your spirit. Additionally, you’ll look extraordinarily cool, and women might even find you more attractive because they can’t see the whole ‘*nerd*’ thing you have going in the background.

This is sort of like a timeline

March 8, 2008

So much can change in just one page.

Maybe I should update my blog more often. I usually get more comments here, and the people are generally smarter.

Peter Popoff is a Mother Fucker.

January 16, 2007

Last night I was flipping through the channels, and I caught an infomercial in which Peter Popoff, a multi-generational scam artist, proclaimed that he wanted to give everyone his “Miracle Spring Water”. This immediately grabbed my attention, and I really had no choice but to watch, and let my rage grow.

During the infomercial, clips of him running his scam to large groups of mostly-obese people in some kind of southern convention hall were shown. He would walk up to people who were obviously pre-screened, state their problems, and then put his hand on their head, and scream some random catch phrase. Then a few seconds, or a few minutes later the person would show or just tell peter that he or she was cured. Among the things peter has cured are:

  • Cancer
  • Blindness
  • Deafness
  • Bad Lungs / Asthma
  • Crippled Legs
  • Any Disability that stems from old age
  • Probably Everything except aids

In addition to the brainwashing footage, peter and his wife also read through poorly written, cracked-out letters from people who were apparently cured of all their problems, except for the one that prevents them from writing a decent letter. A few can be found at peter’s website. Here’s one for starters:

I laid my hands on yours through the television. You looked right in my eyes and began to tell the financial burden that was depressing me and making me sick to go in the name of Jesus and I felt it leave. You also said I would receive money with the next four days. Well Praise God! Three days later I received enough money to make a house payment. Thank you so much for letting God use you!
–Sister B. Bowen, Constantine, MI

It’s no secret that those who aren’t confident in their selves tend to sacrifice their lives to other causes, and that’s just fine. If they feel going to church is going to improve their self esteem, that’s great. However, what peter popoff is doing is complete exploitation. He is using lies to manipulate these people into lining his pockets.

This isn’t even the first time peter popoff has been involved in this racket. During the 80s, Peter did the exact same stuff, and his plans were foiled by a guy named James Randi who did an expose on popoff which aired on the tonight show. In the expose, James proved that his wife was relaying interview data via a radio to him for use in his faith healing stunts. Less than a year after the expose, Peter was forced into bankruptcy.


Youtube: The original James Randi Expose
Peter Popoff’s Official Website
Article about what happens when you order from Popoff
WikiPedia Article

Peter Popoff needs to be stopped. This asshole should not be as rich as he is, and I won’t be happy until he is publicly humiliated, again.

America’s Intelligence can be gauged by 0day Piracy

May 26, 2006

With access to all the newest pirated software, and media, I have a birds-eye view of trends in software, music, television, film, and just about anything which holds value, and can be distributed electronically.

In recent days, I have come to realize that the intelligence of america can be gauged by the 0day software that’s released on a daily basis. For those of you who are unfamiliar with 0day, go read this.

Almost weekly, a new program to log instant messages is released. That’s right, weekly. By interacting with some of my more stupid friends, at least once per week one of them asks me for a program they can use to check up on their girlfriend, and every time I tell them to just break it off, because they aren’t ready for a commitment. I could give them these applications, but it’s an invasion of privacy, and it’s not necessary. With the number of requests I get for these applications, I must assume they are in high demand.

The companies who make these programs are just providing the market with what they demand, but it’s just unethical, and stupid.

I’m sick of writing for now. More will be written in the future.

internets lol

March 19, 2006

hey kids,

i quit posting so much here, cause the thing got so big, and less small.

visit my regular blog at

Laterios kids.

Spam Injection

December 8, 2005

In these past two weeks, three of our hosting client websites have been exploited by a new, and common security hole among Contact Forms.

The attack itself is extremely simple. Simply stick \n or \r into the “subject” or “your email” field in an email to create a new line, then bcc in the rest of your comma-delimited email addresses in. Then when you submit the form, all of those bcc’d in email addresses will recieve the message that was intended to only be recieved by the you.

What spammers are doing is exploiting the above hole, and sticking their own spam into the ‘message’ field, and sticking their database of emails into the bcc field.

What can you do to stop this stuff?

1) Image Verification
Many of these exploits are run on a reutine basis by bots. Bots can’t usually detect what’s in an image, let alone one that is written on an angle with different colors throughout the pattern of letters. Require a user enter a string of letters he would have to read off of an image to send out his message.

2) Complicated PHP Code
Here’s some complicated php code that can be used to stop this kinda thing, you will need to edit some variables to fit your form:

if (preg_match(’ /[\r\n,;\’?]/ ‘, $_POST[’email’])) {
exit(’Invalid email address’);
else {
//code to send the mail

3) mod_security
mod_security is an addon module for apache that is made for filtering out all kinds of attacks. SQL Injection, XSS, and it can even filter out this kinda attack. Just add this into your mod_security configuration:

SecFilterSelective POST_PAYLOAD "Subject\:" chain
SecFilterSelective ARG_Bcc ".*\@"
SecFilterSelective POST_PAYLOAD "Subject\:" chain
SecFilterSelective POST_PAYLOAD "\s*bcc\:"
SecFilterSelective ARGS_VALUES "\n\s*bcc\:.*\@"

4) Multi-part forms
If they have to go through 3 or 4 pages to exploit your script, this is going to lessen the likelyhood of a bot-based attack.

Many many many many many scripts are vulnerable to this attack. Take care of your websites, will ya people?


October 29, 2005

For the past couple weeks, I’ve been avoiding porno and masterbation. This past week, Any time i go more than 2 days without looking at porn, I have dreams about sex.

On the days where I do look at porn, etc. I don’t have any sex dreams. Hell, i don’t even remember the things I dream about on those days.

Hell, I think i prefer the sex dreams over normal old pornography.

It’s all very strange. I wish there was a way for me to look at porn, and still have the dreams.

That’s about it.

what the…

October 25, 2005

Going through my blog referers, somebody actually came to my blog while googling ‘meet the people at burger king in lakeville’

Going to that page of search results, I managed to be the 7th result on the first page.

Is this some kind of message? There is a lakeville town a few towns away. I’m not sure if there’s a burger king there, But there probably is.

Why the hell would somebody even be searching for that? Is there some promotion going on at a burger king somewhere in lakeville where you can meet some people?

Why god why?

If you were the person searching, please let me know what you were looking for.