December 4, 2005

A few years ago, some idiots got an idea to remake the dukes of hazard, and put it into a movie. When the movie came out, it recieved horrible reviews, but a bunch of idiots still went to see it because they wanted to stare at jessica simpson’s tits for an hour and a half. When they went, they discovered jessica simpson is only in the movie for less than 10 minutes, but their thirst for low-class entertainment was quenched with speeding cars, and lots of other things that originated in the deep south.

Well, a few months ago a marketing agency had to get together and figure out how they could sell this awful movie on dvd. They realized they were up against a brick wall because the theater release had come out to awful reviews, and they had pissed off a lot of people by not coming through on their advertisement of a sex/violence-filled movie. They knew they wouldn’t be able to sell this movie back to the people who had heard the professional, and personal reviews from people who saw this movie in theaters.

So what did they do? They used a method that has been used quite frequently this year; they released an Unrated dvd, and stuck some commercials advertising a bunch of other sexy girls that were in the movie, but not playing a major role. Why? Because just about everyone realizes jessica simpson isn’t going to get naked on camera, but due to the fact that the careers of these other actress’ careers are just beginning, they will probably get naked, if only for the extra money.

However, there is no guarantee that these girls will actually get naked. They just show these girls, and accompany them with a narrator blurting out a bunch of suggestive catch phrases.

Will there be any nudity in the unrated version? I doubt it. I’m going to download the dvdrip later tonight, because I don’t want to take any chances with my $20. I’ll let you know if there is anything worthwhile.


One Response to “Unrated!”

  1. Krista Antonini Says:

    The Daisy Dukes are starting to wear. Alright, when your younger no big deal but did you ever see that high school picture of the chick with the really big cool burn-out hair and then run into her years later and she looks exactly like the high school yearbook? It’s scarry, it’s harry, it’s the Daisy Duke underwarey.

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